"Day by day I struggle to maintain not only my strength but also my sanity. It's all a blur. I have no energy to write. I don't know what's right or wrong anymore..." - taken from the movie "Platoon"(1986)
Always follow what's in your heart Always listen to what's inside Always fly high And don't come down And don't come down Push yourself over the limit Push your mind I had with your spirit Push it well You never thought you could alright And never come down And never come down - Pink Life, Gyskard
I can't believe that today is my 3rd year anniversary in this office! Wah! :) I have spent 3 freaking years in this job and I must say I gained a lot of things. I've made friends here. I think I matured as a person. I learned how to handle stress and of course, time management. Hehe. Oh! I almost forgot... multi-tasking also. :)
When I try to think of the most important thing I learned here, I can't help but say that this job has made me stronger as a person. I can say that I've been more wiser with my judgements and decisions. Although the thing that scares me is that I think sometimes I don't feel anymore. In other words, "manhid" or "pusong bato." There are times wherein I feel that my heart is not working anymore. Mind over heart, I guess. I don't know but I have this tendency to detach from my feelings.
Whatever it is, I'm still grateful that GOD gave me this job. I know that it's not perfect but nothing and nobody's perfect in this world. There is no such thing. You just have to appreciate the simple things. I guess one of the reasons why I lasted this long in this job are my friends. I look forward to seeing them everyday. Knowing that they're there and we share the same sentiments... means a lot to me. :)
Throwback Patty
These past few days, I've been LITERALLY hooked to my Wonder Woman vcds. I remember watching this show when I was a kid although I never really understood the story they presented every week. I was so fascinated with the costume, effects, and of course the sensual swirl. Hehe. :) Then yesterday, I was surfing the net and I found out that there will be a Wonder Woman film and it will be shown in 2007. I was so excited! Wow! I guess as a fan, I've been waiting for this. I suddenly felt anxious but in a good way I guess.
In line with this, I've also noticed that lately I'm attracted to retro stuff. I love wearing vintage shirts and I'm back to wearing filp-flops! Haha! I know there was a time wherein I despised wearing flip-flops so I wear slip-ons at home. But now I have 4 or 5 flip-flops and I feel so comfy wearing them outside. Then I also like listening to punk rock bands. I mean, bands that sound 80s. I recently bought The Killers, Franz Ferdinand, Cindy Lauper, and Michael Jackson. :)
I'm not sure why but I guess it stems from the fact that I am a kid at heart. I admit that I'm still immature with regard to a few things. Matters of the heart is one of those things. Hehe. :) I'm 26 years old but part of me is still that 12 year old and I know that there are bigger things waiting for me in the real world.
The Truth Is Out There
I guess we live in a world full of uncertainty. Everyday we wake up not knowing what will happen to us or to our loved ones. We just pray for grace that whatever comes our way, we'll be able to handle it.
This afternoon, Monch and I were talking about the future and what it holds for us. Apparently, I'm still in the process of trying to find out what my true calling is. Yikes. That sounded kind of deep. Seriously, I'm still trying to discover what my passion is. Is it in writing poetry? Is it working behind the camera? Maybe in answering calls? Yuk. Did I just say that out loud?! Anyway, sooner or later I'll know what my real purpose in this life is. I have faith. :) ------------------------
I think I'm going to snap or probably go insane one of these days. There's this girl in the office who apparently is a notch higher than me but knows too little. It's kind of frustrating and irritating because I realized that there are other people much more qualified than her. I swear while talking to her this afternoon, I could imagine myself strangling her with my bare hands. Good thing I snapped back to reality.